Green Light

I was so anxious as i got up yersterday morning, i had a nightmare. It started when i was drinking saturday night. When I was'nt speaking at somepoint and just all these thoughts again flashed before my eyes. Alcohol could be an accesory. Fear is somewhat hampering the way of my path. My aspirations are being dented by shattering pieces of glasses. Again i felt so scared just to think of it. I was like a candle melting down slowly. Ego has again crushed the belief in me. The only thing that i sometimes cling on to. But of course, i have to refocus.. I have to pull my self off that hole where i often slip a lot of times. I want to be overpowered by optimism, something that i've always had just in mind. To open up, I need to pull the string of my bow! This bow which carries my thoughts. But the string apears to be stucked. I am so eager to rock the boat but it looks that i am so weak. In my dream.. pictures of my love ones were fading as i looked closer... I'm afraid of where this journey will bring me as i am the navigator. I have taken so many things for granted but i know all of this were under the bridge. And so i must go on, if i had to climb the highest mountain, or swim a never ending ocean, for my son, nevertheless, i am not stopping.